Love Songs are Not Always Love Songs

Okay so I heard a nauseating song on the radio today that reminded me of something that always irritated the hell out of me back in high school. The song was the ever sappy “I will Always love you” by Whitney Houston. There never seemed to be a high school dance that did not include this song and it was usually dedicated by a guy to his girl. The freaking song was about Whitney Houston leaving Kevin Costner!! I am all for dedications because with the right song it can be sweet and very meaningful but in so many cases, it just wasn’t. People always seemed to miss the actual meaning of a song and ended up dedicating a break up song or a song that really didn’t pertain to their situation at all. So I wanted to run down a list of songs that seemed to fit this bill from our era and a few from other eras that are so grossly misunderstood that it is actually kind of funny. Keep in mind I am not saying that all of these songs are bad, as a matter of fact, many of them are quite good but have just been taken out of context.  I have included the videos for you to see and listen for yourself.

“Angel” by Sarah McLachlan

This song, as pretty as it is, really has nothing in the world to do with love between two teenagers but yet many of us groped our “loved” ones at dances back in the day to this song. The song is actually talking about a woman who is having a hard time and has met many obstacles in life along the way. She finds comfort through spirituality and she never references a guy or love or anything like that. It is actually a painfully depressing song, so I always found it funny when people at dances would dedicate this song to their boyfriend/girlfriend of the week. Chances are the person that they were dating was not an angel and the only comfort they provided was heavy petting and hot makeout sessions.

“More Than Words” by Extreme

Another song that I actually like but I think the meaning was lost on a lot of people (at the time including me) The song was co-written by the guitarist Neno Bettencourt in what was rumored to be his expression of love for lead singer Gary Cherone, unbeknownst to him. I am not in any way a homophobic person, I just think it is funny that this song was partially written for the guy singing it and he had no clue. Anyway looking past that part of the song, the song itself is kind of like an ultimatum. The guy is saying that he wants his lover to say more than just “I love you” and show him some physical affection. Nothing wrong with that. But it is how he follows it up with saying that basically if the “lover” doesn’t give him some action then he will take his love away. Damn, that’s harsh. “Put out or we’re through!!” could have been a good name for the song. Which now thinking about it, it might actually be a pretty good representation of many high school “relationships” Anyway, on with the list!

“Crash into Me” by Dave Matthews Band

Don’t get me wrong, I love this song, and if you listen to just the first couple of verses then it is a perfect love song but when you get to the last part of the song it turns into a creepy voyeuristic Peeping Tom/stalker type thing. The song starts off and you think “Oh, he is just so dedicated to this girl!” with his seemingly sweet lyrics of “Sweet like candy to my soul/sweet you rock/sweet you roll” and “Touch your lips just so I know/in your eyes, love, it glows.” All that sounds really nice and sweet, right? Well that all kind of goes to the wayside when Matthews sings “Oh I watch you there/through the window and I stare at you/You wear nothing but you wear it so well/tied up and twisted/ the way I like to be” I think it is a clever song to say the least but unless you are dedicating this song to the woman that you watch through her window while you sit naked in the bushes then this is probably not a good song to spring on someone you love. Really what would you say if the guy you are dating said this song makes him think of you? “Oh, how sweet! You like to watch me undress while I am blissfully unaware. You are the sweetest!!”

“As Long as You Love Me” by Backstreet Boys

Ahh, finally a song that I truly hate. This song was one of many really bad “love” songs by the Orlando-based sugar factory known as the Backstreet Boys. Every song they ever had was one of two things: 1) It was a whiny, sappy plea for love or 2) The song was about how awesome they were. But I digress, this song would have been bad even if it was written and performed by the Beatles. The whole song is basically about lowering your standards for finding someone to love or more accurately having no standards at all. Just read the chorus and you will see what I mean: “I don’t care who you are/where you’re from/what you did/As long as you love me.” So….see what I mean? They didn’t care if a hump-backed disfigured child murderer loved them. “It’s cool, as long as you love me.” No wonder so many girls back then dated assholes. I remember hearing this at dances and looking around and all the girls were happily dancing and singing along every word of this song and thinking, “Really?? You will take whoever will love you? You’re hot, have some standards.”

“Wannabe” by Spice Girls

Though I am not sure if this was classified as a love song, I sure remember the hell being played out of this song at dances and once again all the girls dancing around and singing it. This song could possibly be the biggest reason for high school infidelity during our time. Why you ask? Well because all of the girls were singing “If you want to be my lover, then you gotta get with my friends” to all the guys. Guys take things pretty literally sometimes, so I am sure there was someone that wanted a girl and in order to get her he felt that he had to go through all of her friends first. I wonder if while they were writing this song if the following conversation happened,
Spice Girl #1 “Hey, other Spice Girls, don’t you think its kind of silly for us to ask guys to sleep with all of our friends before getting with us?
Spice Girl #2, #3, and #4 all look thoroughly confused and just giggle until they forgot what they were talking about.
This is why all the crap that was put out during that time were so bad. No one ever gave a thought to what they were singing or saying, and apparently no ever thought while they were listening either.

“Lightning Crashes” by Live

This song confused the crap out of me. I mean I understood what the song was about, to me that was clear. But I couldn’t understand at all why 1) it was being played at a high school dance and 2) why would anyone be stupid enough to consider this a “love” song. I am sure most people I know did not consider this to be a love song but I distinctly remember this song being played at least 3 or 4 times as a dedication. What the hell? The song is about a new mother having a new baby and an old mother dying in its place. Where is the romance in that? New babies and dead mothers = Love?

There are a crap load more but these were just the really big standouts to me.  What does all this prove?  Not much really.  It just shows that when we were young, we were stupid.  Our parents probably looked at our generation the same way we are looking at our kids thinking, "Can they just not listen to the words and figure this out?"