Yay!! TN made it to the Top 5 of another list...ahh crap its about being fat.

We are always really interested in lists.  It gives us the feeling of having more information and it categorizes it for us.  Some lists are really positive like "Top Ten Best Vacation Spots" or "Twenty Places to Find a Sex Partner" but then there are the depressing ones like "Most Depressing States" (which TN made it in the top 5 for last year).  Well, Tennessee has another reason to be proud today.  In a study released today we were #4 on the most obese list in the country.  What an accomplishment!!  I feel proud (ashamed) that I helped to contribute to this statistic. I am considered to be obese, which I can agree with even though I would like to think that I am EXTREMELY big boned.  Tennessee had over a 30% population of fat people.  But I have a very plausible theory for the whole thing.
Eating healthy is expensive as hell, eating garbage is cheap.  That is about as basic as it gets.  I can go down to Wal-Mart right now with $10 and buy 5 boxes of Little Debbie snack cakes or I could maybe buy 2 Healthy Choice Meals and that could be a stretch.  Its the same when we go to even a fast food joint.  The triple cheese bacon fried fat burger might cost $3 but if you want one of their healthy alternatives like a salad it will cost about $6.  Why?  A salad is lettuce, tomatoes, onions, and some dressing (all pretty cheap if you buy it at the grocery store & make it at home.)  A big fried burger has beef (presumably), bacon (maybe), cheese product, and a bun (which if it was all bought at a grocery store would be a lot more expensive to make, freaking bacon is like $6 a pack now, WTF?)  We all tend to go for the quick cheap burger because its easier to eat while driving and its cheap.  Have you ever tried to eat a salad while driving?  Its damn near impossible. We are a nation on the go, we need something that we can just throw down our throats and keep going.  The fast food industry knows this so they make these easily consumable sandwiches which are admittedly delicious.
The fast food people start catching flack because everyone realizes this, so the geniuses come up with another idea.  They offer healthier sandwiches like grilled chicken, turkey burgers, and deli style sandwiches.  You think "Hey, this is great!  So it will be easier to eat healthy and since its a sandwich it'll cost about the same, right?"  Nope, prepare to be disappointed.  The Grilled Chicken sandwich at Burger King is about $1.50 more than a regular Whopper, the grilled chicken at McDonalds is about $1.75 more than a Big Mac, the deli sandwich options at Arby's are nearly double the amount of a roast beef sandwich, and the Turkey Burger at Hardee's is a little closer at only about $1 more than a regular Heart Attack Burger.  They all prey on our proposed desire to be healthier and want to make sure to cash in on it.  I noticed at McDonalds the other day that you could substitute Apple slices for fries in the kids meal....for an extra .95 cents.  Why?!?!  Its a pack of cut up apples, an apple is like .50 cents a pound!!
All of it seems like a small price to pay for a little healthier choice but it adds up.  The most appealing/appalling thing they have come up with now are the Dollar Menus at these places.  Each item is like 1,000 calories each, but hey its cheap.
So here is my solution to all of this (I could keep going but I am sure that you get my point on all the price comparisons):  Since the government already places all of these regulations on our day to day lives, why not pass a bill to make it an incentive to make healthy choices cheaper?  Look at what they have done to cigarettes, by next year each time you buy a pack of delicious, relaxing cigarettes you will have to see a picture of a black lung or a dying cancer patient printed right on the pack (and this is after they have already taxed the hell out of it already).  So if they can do that with cigarettes, then why not something similar to fattening food?  Would you still want to eat a triple bacon burger if it was wrapped in a picture of a naked Rosie O'Donnell or John Goodman eating the same burger?  Would you still want that deep fried chili taco burger if there was an additional fat tax of $3?  Some people would but maybe not. 
Another idea, going back to the idea of incentive for the fast food people would be getting a tax break for offering food that doesn't cause immediate heart attacks.  Then maybe they could lower the prices a bit since they are getting a break.  Or they could impose a "Price Gouging Penalty" for any restaraunt that charged more than $2 for a salad.
Like I said give me a reason this couldn't be done.  You can't because it is all perfectly reasonable when you consider what they have done with wonderful cigarettes.
So, TN is fat, the fourth fattest state to be exact.  So once again we can celebrate in our mediocrity.  Maybe we should have a party, I'll order the cake and you bring the Ben and Jerry's.